sad sack.

i've been watching a lot of pbs lately which is as lonely as it sounds. because of this new habit, i stumbled upon 'alone in the wilderness part two' which is about an old man back in the seventies who is...wait for it...alone in the wilderness (part two). i watched the whole thing and i will concede that i kind of really enjoyed it. naturally, being thirty one and not ninety, i find this as alarming evidence that i need to become more social. the problem is that i'm deeply misanthropic despite my generally cheery exterior; it's just that i'm very protective of my time and won't let any old fucktard waste it. given that the ratio of fucktard to non-fucktard is incredibly and unfavorably imbalanced, it's not hard to understand why i would fiercely guard my moments of leisure.

nevertheless, there is something to be said for leaving my apartment for reasons other than having to work or needing to replenish my nutella supply. and while i am not quite ready to commit to extended human interaction, i am willing to make the effort for the canine kind. yes. a puppy to be exact. i plan on getting a baby black lab at the beginning of march (from a rescue, of course). why wait so long to get him, you ask? because mama's got holiday plans and holiday presents and holiday plane tickets to buy. that means a lot of money saving, my friends. but it will be well worth it - i'm already marking x's on my obscenely large kitchen calendar, counting down the days to christmas in march. and you better believe that my adoration for my canine companion will be rivaled only by parker posey's brilliance in best in show. this dog is gonna be set!!!

in the meantime, i will do my best to broaden my horizons with my fellow mankind. for now, here's your found item of the day:


oh god.